I've been working a lot on letting go.
Letting go of the disappointment.
The expectation of myself.
Not in a hopeless sense, but in a way that reflects my reality.
Following dreams is not easy. Making the decision to was.
Since then, I've needed to give myself the space, and apparently, the time (I never factor this) to move through many phases of the process..
I've been euphoric, anxious, grieved for things I've lost, reflected on my past, clarified on what it is I want for my future, and listed the pros and cons of pretty much every decision in between.
Not everything has turned out that way I envisioned,
(But when does it ever).
Most of the time, our future works with the universe in ways we could not anticipate. Most of the time it shocks us, because we cannot truly be limitless with our dreams.
We have a hard time picturing our sacrifices, and even put parameters on our hopes and desires because we are subject to influence from our present, our past.
We believe we aren't capable of certain successes.
But the truth is; the possibilities are vast.
The universe doesn't consider our fears or our emotions. It spits out opportunity, it manifests our dreams, it reflects our intentions.
Sacrifices I will have to make.
Visions I will have to let go of.
But dreams I will hold tightly.
And when I come up against a challenge, a decision, or (often) a confronting emotion - I will recall that feeling of what I want. That feeling when I imagine having it all and am surrounded by everything I dream of accomplishing and ever truly desired.
Knowing it might look different then anything I could ever see for myself, this feeling is what will keep me going.
So I set my intentions proudly, and communicate with the universe what it is I truly want.
xox Maddie