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Writer's pictureMaddie Phillips

The States of Being


Emotions are probably one of the most difficult things to manage in this human experience. We are controlled by the state that we're in; often emotional.


Emotional management may be considered as a 'soft' skill, but life sure can be hard without the right practice.


There is no exact formula to deal with an emotion. Unfortunately, there is no be all, end all way to raise our vibe no matter the state we end up in. Since emotions are energy in motion, this energy can get stuck in the body, stuck in the mind, and often we don't even consciously manage it - leaving it up to the subconscious (which will do what it's always done with it). We are left to fester in the emotion, become numb or dismissive to it, or have a physical reaction. No matter the emotion, the outcome is the same: our state has changed.


When we become consciously aware of our state, emotions are the tool to changing it (as they have caused whatever current state we are in). And so we begin the unraveling.

"The mind has difficulty coming up with a solution for a problem it has created."

A low state of being can feel like a permanent state of being and we can easily identify with the emotion that got us there by using statements like "I am this emotion".

When asked how you want to feel, or how you want to feel in your life, we often visualize positive emotions. So when we experience emotions that don't feel good, it can throw us off track and that state can be difficult to navigate back to happiness, peace, prosperity, motivation, etc.

When our state of being doesn't support how we want to be, it can cause confusion, frustration, and even defeat.

It takes practice to manage emotions in a way that doesn't hold us back. There are also many variables during an emotional experience; environment, situation, and always, our past experience. These variables prevent us from coming to a conclusion on how to deal with an emotion each time it comes up, so it can be helpful to dig a little deeper during or after experiencing the emotion that changed our state.


Ask yourself a few questions;

Do I need to think with this emotion?

Do I need to move with this emotion?

What do I like about feeling this emotion?

What do I dislike about feeling this emotion?

What do I get out of by identifying with this emotion? (include positive/negative)

Is there something I can do next time to avoid this emotion?

What would it look like for me to handle this emotion differently?


Through these questions, we can get to know our triggers better, what our expectations are, and where the misalignment is (when looking at what we want to happen and what is happening). For example, we may find that we constantly take action to put ourselves in situations that we know will leave us feeling a certain emotion (such as disappointment).


With a bit more practice, we can be the masters of our own minds, no longer identifying emotions as part of our identity but energy in motion as a part of life and a skill we need to practice. Controlling which state we stay in comes with time; it is never about not feeling emotions, but about allowing them to come and go with little resistance.

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